Resurrecting Romance
Resurrecting Romance 2022 collage in antique mount and gold frame 63 x 79 cm
What the Body Knows ( but may have forgotten) - Resurrecting Romance
Introduction
Sanctus, Sanctus, Sanctus, Dominus... I now realise that I loved the role of serving as Altar Boy in celebrating the Catholic Mass, not because of any religious aspects, I do not think I have ever really believed the dogma, but because the role offered an introverted boy an opportunity to perform, the romance of playing a role in a mystical, artistic production, to speak in a foreign tongue, dressed up in a red cassock and a surplice embellished with lace and embroidery. This need for romance and performance has surfaced a few times in my life as evidenced when, while involved in thinking through an art collaboration with the theme “What the body knows ( but may have forgotten ) “, I started to realise that romance and the drive to perform, was not totally buried, that while it seemed to be forgotten, my body still knew, romance was still influential, just out of sight.
When I first met my life partner, Gavin Hughes, I was still fairly naive, romantic in an old fashioned sense, falling in love with an image, not questioning or intellectualising; acceptance of a feeling, as a fantasy, refreshing in the face of the realism that permeates life. One day, as a partner sometimes does when you are not fitting their idolised concept, Gavin snapped “stop acting like a romantic schoolboy”. In response, I “buried” my romantic nature and learnt ways of being an artist and “sophisticated man of the world”; opera, jazz, philosophy and literature, modern / contemporary art, vintage wine, single malt and cognac, fine dining and art house cinema.
Resurrecting Romance - 35 Collages
Now, having just turned 80, I am reviving romance and have created a series of collage images, a cipher of my life memories and interests, filtered through the lens of romance. The 35 collages, “Resurrecting Romance”, are the core of this art work, that was expanded into a performance installation exploring my past and all the people who had influenced my life, my art, my emotional development.
101 People - 100 images
During the process of resurrecting romance I tried to remember who were the people I have liked, loved, lusted after; that mixture of people we meet, share life with and lose track of during a long life - family, fantasy, fetish and friend. The start of the process was to trawl through old photographs, looking at people and scanning faces in a crowd - a visual palimpsest, interweaving layers of personal history, events and narratives, creating a tapestry of meaning and memory. Some were easy to decipher, especially those whom I still see a few times a year, others, so real in the mind. Yet, there is a puzzle, about the relationship, how it started, how it ended. Did the relationship leave any trace, any influence, on my way of thinking.
One was a face I had not seen for years, it was a bit of a shock, the name had floated in my brain since I had first meet him in 1961, a year of growing up with another one hundred or so trainees. A one way relationship, he was the athlete, biggest and strongest in our class – I tossed around in his wake, seeking protection in the shadow. Never seeing him again after graduation; a subject of passionate longing, an ideal, a shimmering oasis, an imaginary lover who would hold and protect; the memory manufactured over sixty years of dreaming. Now, reality is a shock, the bull necked, thuggish, square jawed face and hard unsmiling mouth; the face does not fit.
Looking at a photo of my mother and I am not sure, how I felt, now fifteen years after her death, whether I actually loved or was it “everyone loves their Mother”, so I must. I cannot recall the feeling or memory. I do discover five other people who somehow exude, in memory, a semi-mothering relationship. Does that count?
I look at my father – I tried to love him - it now seems that there was a reverse influence; I had determined not to gamble nor base relationships around drinking sessions in public bars.
People in the arts certainly were influences - actors, painters, sculptors and writers. The career of an actor, seen in an early performance at Griffin Theatre and followed through live theatre and cinema. Reading a book, seeing a painting or sculpture and developing, almost a fetish, for experiencing every new work that artist produced.
In a few cases the intimacy was over and beyond experiencing the art.
Among the images are lovers, affairs of the heart or maybe just the loins; short term relationships, sexual relationships that grew into long term friendships and faint glimmers, the faded memories of a few relationships, one night stands, that had not been erased completely. and dominating all are passionate long term affairs of the heart and the mind.
Reclamation of the past, like an archaeological dig, turned up solid evidence in the form of these images, triggering memories and a reminder: What the body knows (but may have forgotten).
Resurrecting Romance - Performance Script
CLICK HERE to view script document on a separate page.
Introduction
Sanctus, Sanctus, Sanctus, Dominus... I now realise that I loved the role of serving as Altar Boy in celebrating the Catholic Mass, not because of any religious aspects, I do not think I have ever really believed the dogma, but because the role offered an introverted boy an opportunity to perform, the romance of playing a role in a mystical, artistic production, to speak in a foreign tongue, dressed up in a red cassock and a surplice embellished with lace and embroidery. This need for romance and performance has surfaced a few times in my life as evidenced when, while involved in thinking through an art collaboration with the theme “What the body knows ( but may have forgotten ) “, I started to realise that romance and the drive to perform, was not totally buried, that while it seemed to be forgotten, my body still knew, romance was still influential, just out of sight.
When I first met my life partner, Gavin Hughes, I was still fairly naive, romantic in an old fashioned sense, falling in love with an image, not questioning or intellectualising; acceptance of a feeling, as a fantasy, refreshing in the face of the realism that permeates life. One day, as a partner sometimes does when you are not fitting their idolised concept, Gavin snapped “stop acting like a romantic schoolboy”. In response, I “buried” my romantic nature and learnt ways of being an artist and “sophisticated man of the world”; opera, jazz, philosophy and literature, modern / contemporary art, vintage wine, single malt and cognac, fine dining and art house cinema.
Resurrecting Romance - 35 Collages
Now, having just turned 80, I am reviving romance and have created a series of collage images, a cipher of my life memories and interests, filtered through the lens of romance. The 35 collages, “Resurrecting Romance”, are the core of this art work, that was expanded into a performance installation exploring my past and all the people who had influenced my life, my art, my emotional development.
101 People - 100 images
During the process of resurrecting romance I tried to remember who were the people I have liked, loved, lusted after; that mixture of people we meet, share life with and lose track of during a long life - family, fantasy, fetish and friend. The start of the process was to trawl through old photographs, looking at people and scanning faces in a crowd - a visual palimpsest, interweaving layers of personal history, events and narratives, creating a tapestry of meaning and memory. Some were easy to decipher, especially those whom I still see a few times a year, others, so real in the mind. Yet, there is a puzzle, about the relationship, how it started, how it ended. Did the relationship leave any trace, any influence, on my way of thinking.
One was a face I had not seen for years, it was a bit of a shock, the name had floated in my brain since I had first meet him in 1961, a year of growing up with another one hundred or so trainees. A one way relationship, he was the athlete, biggest and strongest in our class – I tossed around in his wake, seeking protection in the shadow. Never seeing him again after graduation; a subject of passionate longing, an ideal, a shimmering oasis, an imaginary lover who would hold and protect; the memory manufactured over sixty years of dreaming. Now, reality is a shock, the bull necked, thuggish, square jawed face and hard unsmiling mouth; the face does not fit.
Looking at a photo of my mother and I am not sure, how I felt, now fifteen years after her death, whether I actually loved or was it “everyone loves their Mother”, so I must. I cannot recall the feeling or memory. I do discover five other people who somehow exude, in memory, a semi-mothering relationship. Does that count?
I look at my father – I tried to love him - it now seems that there was a reverse influence; I had determined not to gamble nor base relationships around drinking sessions in public bars.
People in the arts certainly were influences - actors, painters, sculptors and writers. The career of an actor, seen in an early performance at Griffin Theatre and followed through live theatre and cinema. Reading a book, seeing a painting or sculpture and developing, almost a fetish, for experiencing every new work that artist produced.
In a few cases the intimacy was over and beyond experiencing the art.
Among the images are lovers, affairs of the heart or maybe just the loins; short term relationships, sexual relationships that grew into long term friendships and faint glimmers, the faded memories of a few relationships, one night stands, that had not been erased completely. and dominating all are passionate long term affairs of the heart and the mind.
Reclamation of the past, like an archaeological dig, turned up solid evidence in the form of these images, triggering memories and a reminder: What the body knows (but may have forgotten).
Resurrecting Romance - Performance Script
CLICK HERE to view script document on a separate page.